9.05.2012

Another Goodbye, thoughts on stress, and propaganda.

I've been taking a bit of a technology break lately-- if for no other reason than being too busy to spend time on the computer outside of work.


Look a rodent! Sweet little guy is under the care of my neighbors, his mama died in the storms.

I'm still adjusting to the new routine, and life just keeps happening, so I wonder if I will ever adjust.

Part One:

Last Friday night, after a pizza date with my love, I popped on FB only to find out that a childhood friend of mine had passed on. I am not going to sit here and pretend like we were sooooo close, but growing up we were-  we spent practically every weekend for 5 years together, and at one point we were so gung-hoe about our friendship that we conned our single parents (his dad, my mom) into dating-- that only lasted about 6 months, but for those 6 months we were thrilled by the idea that we might become brother and sister.

Then I moved, and we both changed, and like a lot of friendships, we both moved on to new best friends and life went on. Life "moving on" however, is no reflection of what once was. The afternoons spent hiding from the sun under the bleachers, late night telephone conversations, birthdays, seeing your best friend across the arena at your cheer-leading competition (yes, I once was a cheerleader) all those tender moments, your first real experience with selfless love-- your first true friends in life teach you many things, and while I haven't seen Jon since High School, and I haven't talked to him in over 3 years-- I am so saddened by his departure. But, I am the kind of sad that is also happy for him.

Death is also a beginning and in that thought alone, I have always been able to find peace when someones leaves.

SO to my Old Friend Jon, I wish you a peaceful journey through the cosmos and may the next life bring you the peace you have been seeking in this life.

Part Two:

My job is stressful. I won't complain about it because I am happy to have a job, and I am happy to have consistent income again, but man..  Stressful work environments are SO unnecessary. When I am in these situations, be it at work, with friends, family.... where ever... it really magnifies the human condition. People do not honor themselves. They don't take care of their mental and physical health and it seeps into the fabric of everything else they do.

It turns a glass of wine into an excuse to unload every complaint that has crossed ones mind.
It blinds folks-- making it impossible to to see their own contributions to their unhappiness.
It causes unnecessary reactions-- explosive reactions, anger, fear, jealousy.
It is road rage.
It is not being able to get up on time in the morning.
It is not being kind to others..

...and it just makes me so sad.

If more people took care of themselves, and I mean... really made it a priority, the day to day experience would be so much more rewarding. It isn't selfish when you give to yourself because then you have more to give to others. And buying yourself things isn't giving to yourself-- It's more than that.. it's really working on yourself--  taking time to reflect, exercising, eating right, catering to your spiritual needs (if you have them). That is what makes you great. That is what makes you patient. That is what makes you kind.

Rob and I have been entertaining starting out own business-- and so far, other than the concept of what will make us money, an important factor to this business is how we will treat our employees. We want our employees to have a safe place to go. We want to provide inexpensive options for our employees to exercise and live healthy lifestyles. We want to encourage a playful, and productive atmosphere and most importantly we want our employees to feel like they can express their needs to us. I am trying to find ways to be "smart" about it, it is human nature to take advantage when the structure is "flexible" but I think the balance will be found in a mutual respect between employer and employee. I think it is so easy for businesses to feel entitled. "Hey we give you a paycheck, you need to do x, y, and z... you owe us that" when the reality is.. if you come to work and do your job, you don't owe anyone anything other than being present, but when you create an environment where employees can't leave, or take time off, or get yelled and screamed at for being 15 mins late once a week, it produces an environment of stress. I would much rather my employees  come in 4 days a week and give it everything they've got, and still have some for themselves at the end of the day, then come in 5 days a week, with only 50% productivity as the week closes.

That rant went on longer than I expected.

What I am getting at is this, my job is stressful, and I am proud of myself for "leaving it at the door" at 5pm-- but, there are days when I think I might lose it-- and I just have to remind myself that I am strong, and kind, and in the grand scheme of things, it is just a job and I have a beautiful life waiting for me at home.

Part Three:

Last week we sent out our first round of wedding propaganda--Save the Dates. It's been fun having our friends send us messages about the wedding. We gave our guests the option to RSVP early through our website and getting some RSVP's has been the best part I think. I am really glad we decided to activate the RSVP section of our website because this will give us a good idea of who is going to come and if they are bringing a guest and all that good stuff-- this is especially helpful when you are DIYing almost everything, and I can promise you all here and now, I will not be freaking out the month before the wedding because I need to complete projects-- not if I can help it anyway.

SO there you have it my friends. An update. I am alive. I am well and I have even been doing yoga everyday.

Go me.

How's it going in your life? Send me a link to your best post in the past week so I can catch up with you folks!

Namaste!
r

5 comments:

  1. I just breathed the deepest sigh reading this.. It is such a relief to know that there are people who understand life in the same ways that I do. Your whole rant about stress and work - I feel like you just breathed out all the words in my head. I hate that so much of our life must revolve around work-just to provide the basics. The stress is unnecessary and for what? More and more I've been looking for ways to live on less $. I don't want to work all the time. It's not because I'm lazy, it's just because I want to be in control of my own time and life. I want to spend time doing things that contribute happiness to my life, not doing things that put more and more money into my boss's pocket. I dunno what the right balance is exactly, but I'm looking for it..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hear you girl-- I am thinking about asking my employer if I can work a 4 day week instead of a 5 day week. I don't know what I am going to come up with as the "excuse" but I think it will be beneficial, and honestly today I haven't had much to do-- so I am not going to feel that bad about it. I need a day a lone, to do things for me.. everyone does.

      One thing that really upsets me though, is how often my friends allow their work environment to effect their personal lives. I have a friend who is CONSTANTLY complains about her job, and while I want to let her vent, to me it is pointless to complain about something if you aren't willing to make changes in yourself (ie, how you view the problem in the first place, since you are ultimately in charge of how you respond to conflict and if you let it effect you or not)and it's just a job, there are so many more interesting important things to talk about with your friends, who cares how the CEO of your company spends her money, or if she gave her undeserving daughter a job...

      Just be happy anyway...

      And Hey! You are in SoFla now, we should try and get together one weekend! ;)

      Delete
  2. I always love your rants :)

    So sorry to hear about your friend, how sad :(

    I totally agree about the work environment - work is such a *huge* part of your life that it makes sense that it would affect you. I think more companies will understand the need for a relaxed, safe work environment as our generation moves into more areas of power. Hopefully you and Rob will be part of that movement.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I love your rants. :) I quit my last job, not because I didn't love the actual work I did or the volunteers we served, but because the work enviornment became awful. I had wanted to go for a long time but got in that rut where you feel like you are financially tied to the job. Well, it turns out I really wasn't, and we were just fine. And seriously, I felt so *free* beign away from there. Best choice ever.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. CONGRATS!

      I quit a really negative job once, and by quit, I came in the my beach clothes on returned my work phone, told them they were horrible people and treated their employees and customers like crap, and walked out.

      it was the most liberating moment of my life.. I took myself for a Mexican lunch, drank a margarita at noon and had a glorious day at the beach. :)

      and I love YOUR rants more.
      :)

      Delete

Who doesn't love comments?