Lucid dreams, and weird things.

Sometimes, there just is not enough coffee.

My life in dream land is quite active, so I've been waking up feeling exhausted.

I am a pretty regular lucid dreamer, so I know this this partly my fault. 

BUT WHY would I pass up the opportunity to create a dream?

I ask people questions I would never ask them in real life. 

I hang out with friends and family that have passed, I swim in really awesome pools.

I fly around. A lot. 

Exploration of the subconscious is something I struggle with in waking life;

but in dream land, I am brave.

I'm not sure when I had my first lucid dream, but I started being able to do it frequently about 5 years ago. 

In the dream I was walking on this street in Chicago that I frequented and there was a tree in the middle of the street.. and I thought in the dream... 

Why would the City of Chicago plant a tree in the middle of the street?

Then it occurred to me, they didn't and you're dreaming!

I tried to convince the person next to me that we were dreaming and we should fly around the city, but they thought I was nuts, so I levitated my dream self into the sky and explored Chicago from the clouds solo. 

The first several lucid dreams I had all involved me wanting to fly somewhere.

Now I like to swim everywhere in my dreams. 

I have also become a quiet observer in dreams. 

Perched somewhere in the room, listening to the conversations.

The other night I had a dream where my uncle and R's grandfather (both passed) were sitting amongst us.

It was Thanksgiving, and I was explaining a frustration I had with a family member to the group.

And then I noticed my Uncle Chris sitting next to my mother with his arm around her shoulder. 

We made eye contact.

Chris addressed me and told me to give my mother a message. 

When I called my mother that morning to give her the message, she silenced herself,

got choked up and said:

Chris was in my dream last night too; all I wanted to do was get a damn picture of us together.

I was so busy trying to get the picture, that I didn't get to even enjoy him or talk to him. I was so mad that the stupid camera wouldn't work. 

Chris is my mothers youngest brother, he died in a car accident on his way to the airport to visit us in the states just days before Christmas. He was with his new fiance, bringing her home to meet the family. 

I was in 4th grade, which made me about nine years old.

My sister and Father. My little pony, Chris and I. Circa 1990.

Chris comes to me a lot in my dreams. I know a lot of people won't believe this, but he came to me the night he passed too. My mother rushed me back to bed telling me I had a nightmare, then the phone rang with the news. 

I asked him the other night in my dream why he always comes to me. 

He was my sisters godfather, so I always felt like he belonged to her; but I always get advice from him and messages for other family members. I have a dragonfly tattooed on my rib cage in his honor, because I promise you, every hard situation I have experienced in my life there has been some sign, that he was there to remind me of the strength I didn't think I had.

He answered me with;  

It's because you are always open and it never phases you to see someone from the past, while everyone else is very distracted by it. You listen..

This was confirmed when my mother told me how frantic she had become upon seeing him in her dream.

_______________________________________

Last night R left me a note on my car. I woke up before I could retrieve it. I was so close, I could see the letter pressed against the glass of my wind shield. The envelope was an off white color, with my name scribed across the front. Earlier in the dream I saw him put the note there, but I was trying to get somewhere on time. I knew I would return to my car but I just didn't have enough of the night left. Stupid alarm clocks. 

I want to know what that letter from my love said.

~

My grandfather returns from Spain in a few weeks, so I want to make sure the place is in tip-top shape. I'm hoping for a cooler than usual day here in Florida since a lot of my work today will be outdoors. 

Until next time my friends, 

xo, r